hardcore until the end.

remember the time he grabbed me as I was walking out the door of that dirty club… on the west side. meat packing district…back when there was still meat in the package… ssshhhhhhhh…..
took a car to queens…the summer moon high up above and I wanted to see what big Joel was made of …
speeding car down the west side…big J took me for a ride…

poppers and champagne in the driver’s seat
speeding the BQE like there was somethin’ to beat
swerving and skidding cuz our eyes weren’t on the road
we fucked on the hood of the car in the cold
our bodies writhing and steaming in the air
we spit on the flesh and that back was bare..
fuck lover, you knew all the right spots
the ones that got hard and made me feel hot…
with bite wounds tomorrow, like it or not…
you sealed that deal as soon as we shot…
(CIRCA 1993)
we had studded leather wrist bands…and we were holding hands…

we strutted the village, we owned avenue A
young and hung and fucking proud to be gay
in the faces of losers screaming, “I’ll kick your ass, you fuckin’ queers…!”
you literally spit in their faces and pissed out your beer.
our heads were like robots and our souls were like guns…
we fired off on the world and burned up in the sun.
super commie queer boy punk rock lipstick thugs…
the OD’s, the lows. the highs. and all the lovely drugs.
yeah, we’d rip out our blue hair to get something to smoke…
and the heroin. the meth. the pills. the coke.

we would never seem to get our fill…all the times you threw up your pills…!

there was also those times that we played out like tricks…
pumping and stroking and wagging our dicks
in the faces of men that were smiling in the dark
handing us 50’s for a fling in the park
right around the corner and down the block
“yeah, that’s it bitch, suck that cock.”
we were getting off for 40 bucks a shot
swallowing the last drop, emptying the pot…
loving like pirates, we were living in ‘sin’…
then you left in a heart beat when your disease kicked in.

for that, I thank you…and FUCK YOU.

11years later, you’re still shootin’ that gun…
fuckin hell, kid, are ya ever gonna be done…
actin’ like such a fool…nothin’ more than a tool
you’ve become a lonely, miserable, staggering old mule…

and it’s not sexy, baby…at all.

I remember I decided to love you forever…

I like the view from here, I’ll stay up here…